Why Is It So Hard to Make Friends and What I’ve Learned Trying

Why is it so hard to make friends?

People want connection, don’t they? Scrolling on social media, there are so many big, bright smiles of influencers enjoying life on a beach with their friends, without a care in the world, or gorgeous pictures of parties filled with toothy smiles and laughter. But why can’t I make friends?

Let’s be real, it is NOT easy!

People are in their bubbles and do not have the opportunity to be in community. Sure, we live at a time when we are the most connected in history, but ironically, that further pushes us apart. In a world where we can pick up our phones and order groceries, we do not have built-in chances for human contact. So, what does that mean?

You gotta put yourself out there!

I don’t have children, so I don’t have the local soccer meet-up to meet other moms or school functions to meet potential friends. I have moved a few times in my life, so with each move, I have to create my own opportunities for connections. So I get creative! Below is my making friends go-to guide!

Making Friends 101:

Hone in on your hobbies or what you are interested in. Think big or small. This can include pastimes like pickleball, crocheting, or reading. Find a local group! Join Meetup or Facebook groups. Since it is an activity, it will take the pressure away from one-on-one meet-ups, and you can browse the crowd for your new people!

Host an event! Take from the first concept and host an event at a local bar or restaurant with something you love to do. This way, you can meet locals who share the same interest.

If you are not keen on meeting face-to-face, create an online space to mingle. Apps like Discord also allow you to meet others with similar interests.

Have a Friends Mixer! Reach out to your friends and family and ask them to bring a new friend to a mixer! During this party, you can have icebreakers or getting-to-know-you games.

Take a class! Check out local schools, libraries, or restaurants for classes. This is a wonderful way to meet others in an intimate setting as you learn a new skill! You can get to know your neighbor, check in on their progress, and maybe make a new friend!

In a world where many work from home or where those without school or children to help them make friends, you have to take the initiative and create the opportunity to curate your friend group. Quality over quantity—by finding similar interests, you are more likely to find great matches! Happy friending!